What to say to someone when you first meet them?

Meeting someone new is an exhilarating experience. You wonder about the person, their likes and dislikes, what they do for a living and what kind of personality they have. However, soon after the introduction is made, it gets pretty awkward.

Small talk can be difficult- particularly if you’re trying not to come across as boring or irritating. Sometimes it seems like everything you want to say has already been said by millions of others before you- but fear not! We’ve got your back at making an excellent first impression with some witty conversation starters that are sure not to disappoint.

On Making Eye Contact

Making eye contact does more than simply looking someone in the eyes; it’s a way of connecting nonverbally with another individual – so don’t shy away from locking eyes for just a second longer than usual!

We’re not recommending staring into somebody’s soul until they go cross-eyed – this could be very creepy -, but anyone who gazes at their feet while speaking may appear unsure (or brimming with insecurity). So aim your peepers’ direction towards theirs instead.

Remember though folks- there is such a thing as too much ‘eye-sight’. Avoid giving stink-eye impressions by occasionally breaking away from stare-downs every 5 seconds or so

Match Their Energy

When meeting anyone new, bear in mind that each person has unique social energy levels; some move very quickly through conversations whilst others take things at an easy-going pace. Try matching their social tone straight off the bat – otherwise things might get sticky sooner rather than later:

1) If you happen upon someone bubbly and ebullient right outta’ the gate: match their infectious vibe darnit all!

2) But should your interlocutor give off borderline-morose Stephen-King-Room-Sixteen-Energy… Match that too.

The point being: avoid going over or under their projected vibe, so both of you can get on the same page!

Comfortable Silences

During a conversation, there will inevitably come moments when neither party has anything more to add (at least at that given time). Don’t freak out – silence doesn’t have to be BFF’s with awkwardness- sometimes discomfort lingers for long stretches…

Instead of scrambling for things to say and ending up making everyone feel uncomfortable, take solace in the relaxed-silence.

It’s important! I mean who knows what incredible thoughts baconating in your head during those standard American pauses? Maybe even share some^randomidea^(of your own!)

Avoid ‘Fake’ Compliments

Do not give a disingenuous compliment when meeting anyone for the first time; it just comes across as phoney and can inspire fear they’ll sniff out any further chicanery you engage in!

Giving insincere compliments can also lead people into thinking you are putting them down by trying desperately hard to butter them up…quite frankly no one wants sweaty palms made worse by all that flattery slathered on ‘too-thick-like-maple syrup’.

Keep compliments sincere but minimal – or don’t go throwing out any if you’re really feeling sheepish about whether said-person is typically deserving of worthy kudos.

Nothing quite nails nailing your new-friend-acquisition like an impressive conversation starter. Everyone is different so finding specific common ground might take some work; here are some guaranteed topics to ignite exciting chat:

Sports: If everything else fails then bonding over sports is usually universal – bonus points if you root/rooted-cheer/cheered-for from teams close-by each other in geography…just keep it friendly though- no full-court press arguments…

Movies: Films provide a great talking point, even if you take into account the ludicrously subjective nature of classic favorites! Maybe discuss new releases or upcoming productions and let your taste differ without trying to twist anyone’s arm.

Hobbies: Talking about what one enjoys doing in their free time is often a delightful ice-breaker- just try not to get too personal too quick. Pets, hiking trails and dancing usually inspire warm banter

Travel: If nothing else comes to mind then listen up eager-travelers: tales from other countries/globetrotting can help build interest quickly because everyone loves learning something about new places…well except those afraid of flying maybe!

Now that we’ve covered what you’ve got to say/suggest for those first few moments of conversation; it’s time we lay down on some stuff-to-Avoid like Jonah Hill in SuperBad:

Don’t engage them ^(in,) sudden chit-chat…. It can be startling and may come off as overly aggressive. Take it slow unless said-of-person gives green-light by being gregarious themselves.

Don’t attempt very difficult-to-pronounce words or references unless they are spotted enjoying some facetious repartee – getting stuck mid-sentence whilst the person on the receiving end tries hard (or flounders) only kills momentum…

Most importantly don’t feel an incessant need (no matter how anxious or excited you may be feeling) to fill every silent gap with soundness- embrace gaps as ‘moments-in-time-and-space’ – both introspective/ephemeral…beautiful!

Of course, these tips aren’t gospel truth; different conversational suitors require varied courtship after all. However, with any luck these cheat sheet starters will ignite unprecedented fire within your bonfire-starter boots!

So go forth with confidence reader!
You got this 🙂

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