What happens to a narcissist when you go no contact?

Have you ever dealt with a narcissist? Well, if you have, then congratulations! You have played an unfortunate role in the ultimate tragicomedy of someone’s (or several people’s) life. But how do you deal with them once their claws are deep into your psyche and soul? The answer is: you don’t. That is where the concept of no contact comes in. In this article, we will explore what happens when you decide to go no contact on a narcissist.

The Basics

Before discussing what happens after going no contact, it is essential to know what exactly constitutes ‘no contact’. Generally speaking, it means completely cutting off all forms of communication and physical interaction with the person who has been identified as a narcissist. This includes blocking phone numbers/email IDs/messaging apps/ social media platforms along with any in-person meetings or interactions.

Why Is It Important?

Going no-contact may seem like an extreme measure at first glance, but it serves multiple purposes that include:

Protecting Yourself: Engaging with a narcissistic individual can take a severe toll on one’s mental health.
Preventing Future Abuse: By cutting off all access points for future communication or physical presence, potential abuse can be avoided before it occurs.
Sending A Message: Letting someone know that their behavior was/is unacceptable and should never be tolerated adds weightage to your self-respect and esteem( which might get eroded over time due to constant gaslighting).

Now let us focus on the salient impact areas after enforcing NC.

The Initial Reactivity Phase

When dealing with narcissists’ personality types, they often respond adversely when confronted by anything that challenges their sense of grandiosity and superiority complex(duh!). Initially following implementation of NC there could be two possible scenarios:

Triangulation Attempt: A common tactic by narcissists is to find ways of getting back in touch with their former victim(s) through mutual acquaintances, family members or even stalking( yikes!).This usually happens only when you are ignoring them but snapping the NC policy out right there would certainly provoke it.
Profound Silence: The narcissist won’t attempt direct contact for a while at least. They might think that you will finally ‘come to your senses and start missing’ them (as if…)or try to justify that they are better off without any kind of communication with someone who has caused them pain(confusing much?). This phase doesn’t usually last very long as once they realize the success of implementing NC they become desperate(haha!)for attention and supply.

How Narcissists Respond After You’ve Enforced No Contact

Low-Level Narcissistic Injury

When something causes damage an event in a way that sensibility is questioned which leads into trauma or emotional nonchalance, it’s referred to as narcissistic injury(hopefully haven’t arrived here)! When going no-contact on a person living with NPD ,they may initially shrug off your decision,but gradually/naturally such individuals attach themselves in their sense of grandeur towards those around’em.Hence coming across this barricade would come as hurtful shocker.Note well : This wound basically comes from ‘rejection/silence’, appearing almost same like humiliation / mockery done publicly,reducing self-esteem quotient drastically.At this initial stage one can expect varied responses form the narc(narcissist):

Constantly seeking validation
Passive-Aggressive behavior ranging from open hostility towards others (especially anyone mentioned negatively in context/personal conversation/ memory lane).
Prominent increased indulgence due availability free time.Making use hours on things where partner wasn’t included previously-thereby making asymmetrical shift in power struggle.Clearly it’s an attempt to come up with new weapons of vengeance and for aiming at the vulnerabilities one uncovered during in-person meetings.

Basically, their brain becomes hyper alert & craves constant attention which gets “tackled” by increased indulgence & even more self-obsession-which never had limits before.

Escalation Phase

This stage is where shit really hits the fan(extremely heavy use of sarcasm detected)and triggers start flying like fireworks on Fourth of July!At this point things gain momentum :Narcissists can’t stand feeling weak/less important or insignificant +Remain dislikable to anyone left over that they are hurt/disruptive/aggressive ALL together.. And this let’s out their deeper rage (which was just brewing inside the whole time).Data says around 70% borderline personality disorders (BPDs) tend towards violence& while only 30% have higher probability.However,a narcissist has a whimsical muddling correlation between BPD symptoms which amplifies risks manifold.This escalation phase may lead to:

Hoovering Attempts: An infamous term used to describe attempts made by Narcissistic individuals trying to ‘suck you back in’ after having gone No Contact through:
- Apologetic messages/calls implying regret for previous behavior.
- Acknowledging guilt/remorse without firmly following thru actions(peacocking)
- Appeal from surroundings claiming alarming well-being issues/fake emergencies trying hard get your attention
  2.Intentions To Threaten Your Self-Worth: Any mention of your personal life(including shared moments/friends/traditions)can be twisted,and caged beautifully into a taunt disguised as a joke making everything appear trivial(mostly redirected in directions-self care,career,basic habits etc).
Blatant Character Assassination: Trying Misleading/False rumors to spread to your known circle about being selfish/untrustworthy/shady which might lead to aversion self-isolation from social circles.

The Long Haul

After a while, the narcissist’s behavior will become more and more erratic as they struggle with feelings of impotence and frustration. This can manifest in various ways:

Attempts To Sabotage: The Narc realizes that they are no longer able to control or manipulate you by demand/supply technique,so decides to attack some part of yours attributed for success.This includes trying get fired/grieve complaints /sabotaging employment opportunities etc.
Increased Obsession: At this point,the main focus of N is their aim at winning-you-back (as if)or creating chaos!They may start practicing every technique[aka “hoovering”] hoping one-day things shift back towards them.
Using Mutual Friends As Weapons: If mutual friends stick around after recognizing how destructive he were,hence an intention in using them as informers or tools starts surfacing(ugh!).

This stage could continue until anything serves them well enough(replacement supply source,new addiction like gambling/drug abuse/sex-prostitution).Bottom-line scenario remains unchanged: Try everything possible for exerting dominance,and superiority over anyone dwindling under their supremacy.

Final Thoughts

In conclusion,the narcissistic individual incurs damage once your enforcement policy NC comes into action.It triggers reflexes targeted towards Psychological,social and emotional disarray.Being prepared before effectively implementing it,given any unpredictable range of responses,jumping through hurdles are must prerequisites.While certainly difficult,noContact often ultimately leads freedom, recovery & sanctity altogether.

Dane Raynor

Hey there, I’m Dane Raynor, and I’m all about sharing fascinating knowledge, news, and hot topics. I’m passionate about learning and have a knack for simplifying complex ideas. Let’s explore together!