What are the side effects of implant birth control?

Let’s talk about implant birth control. It’s an amazing contraceptive option that millions of people use worldwide to prevent unintended pregnancy. But everything fantastic comes with a catch, right? That is why we have compiled an amusing list of side effects associated with this method of birth control.

What is implant birth control?

Before diving deep into the possible side effects, let’s start by defining what implant birth control means. This form of contraception involves a tiny metal rod, approximately the size of a matchstick, which contains progesterone hormone – one of two main hormones present in female bodies responsible for regulating menstrual cycles and ovulation.

This small device gets implanted under your skin in your upper arm by a healthcare professional trained to perform this procedure. The idea behind it is quite simple – The progestin gradually diffuses out from the rod into your bloodstream to provide continuous protection from pregnancy for up to three years.

Now that we’ve got that covered let’s get down to business – What are some common (and not-so-common) side effects linked with using implant birth control?

Mood Swings & Emotional Instability

The hormonal changes attributed to progestins can affect mood levels leading you feeling like ‘the ultimate rollercoaster ride.’ One moment you might feel happy and content while at another instance become infuriated over mundane issues.This crazy roller coaster always leaves passengers feeling nauseous after experiencing such high-flying maneuvers!

Acne breakout

How lovely! With its track history as one major cause for acne or other skin infections — who wouldn’t love having extra whiteheads just before their big presentation at work? You likely cherish how much attention and praise everyone will give because it appears so distracting on your face everywhere else!

Nausea

Suppose motion sickness was something you’ve never experienced before??? In that case, you’re about to get a big taste of it. Constant nausea leaves an imprint in your memory that never goes away after getting the implant.

Irregular menstrual bleeding

Who needs pesky regularity? Let’s embrace our inner maverick with this revolutionary birth control method! You may experience unpredictable menstrual cycles; some months have none while others transform into Niagara Falls. But just put up a sign as ‘out of order’ outside washrooms or express yourself by wearing bright red lipstick during such periods – no one has to know anything!

Changes in sex drive

If you thought communication and spontaneity were key ingredients for good relationships think again. The implant surely does not agree they are strictly overrated concepts adapted to promote unrealistic emotional states amongst individuals Consequently resulting in them having little to no libido whatsoever – perfect for those who hate intimacy.

Breast tenderness

Are you tired of being comfortable and happy-go-lucky around town without any disturbances—gals gather around—the latest innovations from the company we all love…implant birth control brings back tender breasts!! Make everyone envious as they watch wide-eyed when busting out all high-class vocals related explicitly towards breast tenderness situation at office parties!

Headaches.

Get ready for migraines described with visuals reminiscent of hammer banging on your head hitting it every five seconds with hands made entirely out iron billet – pulverizing pain becoming unbearable anytime soon.

Other Less Common Side Effects Users Experience Include:

• Weight gain

Nothing feels better than doctors insisting that even though you’ve been tracking everything eat and work so hard said weight changes didn’t happen but doesn’t match what their reality portrays-can make anyone scratch their head while acting calm, cool collected despite feeling like fainting because seriously “What is happening???”

• Dizziness / light-headedness

The ghosts aren’t content popping the balloon inside your head; they want to watch you fall down and get back up again. Users could feel faint at any time, so be careful not to do anything dangerous like reading Shakespearean literature.

• Hair loss

Making peace with the fact that bald patches dot your head gives a sense of completeness and formality around it. Who wouldn’t trade voluminous locks for unique bald spots on their heads? Introducing implant birth control – perfect contraceptive method that lets everyone know about how updated are you!)

• Changes in appetite

Food is overrated anyway – Why bother putting extra spices on your food when all can eat plain meals every day without feeling any cravings right??? Hunger pangs during such times just aren’t necessary—complimenting one’s look even better!!!

• Cold-like symptoms

While other people may run away from flu season or wear face masks due to allergies, implant users enjoy having constant cold-like symptoms helping them stand out among others while nose drips becoming new fashion statements!

Other rare side effects observed by some women using implant birth control include:

  • Depression
  • Fatigue
  • Itching or redness at the site of insertion
  • Vaginal infections
  • Ovarian cysts

Conclusion

In conclusion, while this article was meant to tickle your funny bone, we hope it has also made things clearer regarding possible risks associated with implant birth control. The fact remains that despite all its potential shortcomings (or ‘perks’ if you have a twisted sense of humor), this form of contraception is still one of the most effective available options today.

Discussing these issues openly with doctors may help users make more informed decisions towards choosing appropriate methods suited best for them. Allowing for immediate clarification requests helps see how significant amount comfort provided upon patients receiving clarity thus making implanted device experience less troublesome.

At the end of the day Life surely is never boring especially for those opting-in for implant birth control use!

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